To forgive is to live.

I'm convinced that most of us, at one time or another has had someone that we have fallen out with. There have been times when anger has filled our hearts, we felt that we would never be able to forgive and forget. Maybe it was a brother or sister, a parent, someone at school, a business partner, a neighbor, or simply an acquaintance.

When I was a teenager, I shared a bedroom with my two younger brothers. Being the oldest, of the 2, I didn’t think this was fair. One day, after putting up with their kids’ stuff (I was a man after all), I took a piece of chalk and divided the room with the stern warning that they were not to cross the line or suffer the consequences (saw this done on The Brady Bunch).

This morning, as I write, I think this happens in every area of relationships, marriage, family, jobs, and associations. Something happens in the office, something happens in the neighborhood, something even happens at church, and chalk lines are drawn.

Matthew 18:15 "...if your brother trespasses against you..."

"Trespass" means "to come across." In other words, "You are on my side of the chalk line. You have infringed upon my rights. This is my private territory, and you have come too far."

Jesus says that His followers are supposed to act differently than that. We are supposed to try to get rid of barriers and chalk lines. And if we don't handle bitterness and hostility differently than the way the world handles them, then we have not learned what it means to be a Christian.

Mathew 18: In the Parable of the Unmerciful servant, we see how the master was willing to forgive a servants debt of over 10,000 dollars yet this same servant accused a fellow servant for not paying back a debt to him for a little over 17 dollars. He had the man thrown into prison until he could repay the debt.

When the Master found out, he revoked all he gave him and did the same to him and worse. Then Jesus said, "This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart." Jesus says that God expects us to forgive others even as God has forgiven us.

I don't know how many times I have had to ask for forgiveness, or that I have been forgiven. But there is nothing that will take the load off, nothing that will help you more, than the burden of bitterness being taken off of your heart. As someone has said, "To forgive is to live."

When there is harshness, resentment, a spirit of retaliation or bitterness, this attitude becomes a dam, an obstacle to the grace of God so that it just simply cannot flow through our hearts. God does work through us. We are the body of the Lord. He works through us. But when there is hatred and resentment. . .

Is there anyone reading this who can stand up and say, "I don't have anything hidden in my closet. Everything I've ever said, every thought I've had, has been good and kind. I've nothing to be ashamed about." I doubt seriously that any of us would be ready to say that.

As humans we make some sins more serious than others. The consequences may be bigger, but in the eyes of God I don't believe that to be true, or else we are going to have to call sins "small sins" or "big sins." Sin is sin. Sin is a fracturing of our relationship with God.

These last few months, “who I am” has been greatly challenged. Things have been changing around me and I wondered why I wasn’t being included in these changes. The reason: because I resisted the change. I had the “if it isn’t broke, why fix it” attitude. There’s nothing wrong with this attitude unless it really is broke and you don’t want to admit it.

Sometimes, instead of fixing things, we adapt and get used to the brokenness. We become unforgiving.

Only God can bring about change in our lives. We may try, but we can't do it by our own power. But God can. It may be a tough road for us to follow, but God is willing to follow, but God is willing to lead us every step of the way.

Thank you for your forgiveness!